If I wasn’t certified crazy before I started this cruise perhaps I should have been. Zip Lining!! What was I thinking? And all I broke was a fingernail. I was probably lucky it wasn’t my neck!! Sitting around with friends from the ATW 2018 – Milt & Ginny, Milt mentioned he was going zip lining and Ginny didn’t want to go. Smart Ginny!! Did I want to go along? Sure said I if I can get on the tour. Well I got on the tour.
The night before I woke up in the middle of the night and lay there thinking I must be mad. “How can I get out of this?“ “Maybe I just won’t go.” “I’ll forfeit the price for the tour.” “Didn’t I read something in my travel insurance that said doing dangerous stunts like zip lining would make the insurance null and void?” So now at 3 am, I am on my computer looking for the email from the insurance company to verify this. It could be a good way out. I was wrong. It said nothing about zip lining. So that at least made me feel a little better and upon our arrival in Puerto Vallarta, we took off in a “jitney” type vehicle. That ride alone should have been enough! It was bumpy and rough and shook your bones. We were strapped into bench type seats with straps to hang on to above our heads.
The further out of town we got the rougher the roads, and the poorer the areas became. We saw lots of cows, and a few horses and donkeys and the ever present chickens. One field with horses & donkeys was strewn with watermelons and the animals were eating them and you could smell the fermenting watermelons from our truck.
The area became more mountainous and then we turned off the main highway onto a dirt road which was really rutted and bumpy and finally we arrived at Vallarta Canopy Adventures.
Along with Dona who accompanied us on the drive, we met our guides, Roberto, Smiley & Marlon, and got put into our “harnesses.” We were given huge leather gloves and helmets and lots of instructions on what to do and not do. Then we climbed to our first take off area. To say I was apprehensive is putting it mildly. ….weak hand on the lower cable, strong hand on the upper cable… don’t grip too tightly and don’t grab the higher cable or you could break your arm and relax. Right!!
Sit into your harness. Legs out in front and lean back and enjoy. Right!! And then he lets you go. The trees are whizzing past. Someone is yelling at me not to grip the cable so tightly. Right!! I am holding on for dear life fella, and not letting go! I am heading into the next platform at quite a speed when just before I slam into it, someone applies the breaks and I land almost on top of poor Roberto the skinniest one of the guides. I am hanging on to him for dear life now as I am on a two foot wide platform built around a tree at about 20 or 30 feet up in the air. Finally he gets away from me and attaches my metal doohickey to a rope around the tree. Take a breath. OMG!! I did it and it wasn’t really that bad. The next one I ended up going backwards the whole way across. The next one I let go of the cable above my head and was twirling. The next few I was almost perfect. So there!!
Canopy Adventures was featured on an episode of Amazing Race about four years ago where the contestants had to complete the course we were on today. After the third or fourth zip, we landed at an obstacle race type area. First of all you had to climb half the mountain, then if you wanted to, right!! you could climb up an army style rope ladder. Now you are about 20 to 30 feet above the ground again. Then you had to walk about 15 feet across on a rope like a tight rope walker but sideways, with another rope to hold on to. Then you had to walk across the top of telephone poles. Each pole had a disc about the size of a dinner plate and it was about two feet in between poles. You were attached to a safety line. Because the poles were high, they swayed as you stepped from pole to pole. Two people tried and actually made it across. I was definitely NOT one of them. My legs were to short for the two foot span.
Then we got to the Tarzan & Jane jump. You were attached to a rope and had to leap into thin air and swing back and forth and eventually got to the ground. Some one said once – know your limits. Well this is where I got to my limit. I was in no way going to jump off that platform. The platform itself was scary. Maybe two feet wide around a tree about 30 feet in the air. I took one look and said. I AM NOT DOING THIS! They told me there was no other way down. I said I don’t care I am not doing this. PANIC!
At that moment one of the guides used a zip line that was there, and I said I will zip line down. So they hooked me up but I was still in panic mode and didn’t really want to go. I had my feet planted like a puppy who wasn’t going any further, but Roberto gave me a little shove and I was gone screaming “You pushed me!!!!” But at least I got down off that tree. I wish I could figure out how to attach the video. It is priceless!!
From there it was a short trek to the starting point an they gave us all a shot of tequila. If they had been smart they would have given us the shot at the beginning of this experience. Which by the way, is one I assure you I will never attempt to do again. Been there done that, and it wasn’t even on my bucket list!!!!